what is the meaning of life?

Okay guys, so this post is really just me going out on a whim and having a rant, so I'm not sure on what kind of feedback I'm going to get from you guys but this is a topic that I feel like I just need to get off my chest. Recently I've been having complicated thoughts about the meaning of life and whatnot, and I feel pretty rational in my way of thinking. I haven't written this because I'm feeling unsatisfied with my life or anything, but instead because I simply don't understand it and what better way to share my confusion than blogging?
~~~ Update: I think that I initially decided to write this post to feel a little more understanding of life, but in retrospect I think I was just mulling over my thoughts and ideas, and wanted to hear what you guys think ~~~

Do you ever wonder if people are placed into your life specifically so you can learn something from them, if everyone has a significant meaning to you? I was wondering this at about 2am a few nights ago (go figure), and I've come to realise that pretty much anyone who's ever played a part in my life has given me a lesson to think about. I don't want to call them "mistakes" that other people have made, but it's certainly taught me what not to do with my life.

For example, both my brothers had high expectations for their lives. The oldest didn't reach his dreams simply because someone - a teacher, no less - told him that he wasn't good enough, and so he gave up trying. A similar thing happened to my younger older brother (you know?), but this time the only person discouraging him really was himself. Long story short, both of them ended up doing something they love, but they have to sacrifice those to a few mere hours a month, so that they can earn money to fuel the economy. 

~~~ I didn't know whether or not to include this topic in this blog post because I felt that it's not the sort of thing that anyone wants to read about, but I then realised that when you have a rant that feels so raw and unedited, it should be left in. Feel free to skip this section. ~~~

I don't like the idea of Heaven.
Okay, so this probably isn't the best line to start a topic on, but I feel that it should be mentioned. Sure, eternal paradise sounds lovely, but after endless years of Heaven, wouldn't we get bored? Surely there would come a time when you've done everything you could possibly do in Heaven, maybe twice? What would you do then, continue redoing everything you've already done for the rest of eternity??

I don't like the idea of becoming a ghost.
Again, wouldn't we get bored?? Free travel would be great, but there's only so many countries and cultures you can see before you've pretty much seen it all. Plus, you can't eat the food of said countries, which would suck.

I don't like the idea or reincarnation.
Why would I want to lose all my memories, emotions, relations?? Maybe another chance at life would be great, but surely repeating the same old routine just in another body, again and again, forever, would become pretty tedious? Learning the same things over and over, experiencing love, heartbreak, whatever - we would have done them all before but just not remember it. And if our new 'forms' get better or worse each time we're reborn, depending on how we act, what classifies something as 'bad' enough to end up as a slug? I feel like the more I try to understand life and the afterlife, the more questions arise.

the meaning of life
This is probably the biggest question of all. Sometimes I just get really frustrated with my philosophical brain constantly trying to work out the meaning of life, because what if there is no meaning? We live, we breed, we die. We work all our lives and struggle just to respawn and then grow old and get weaker and watch everyone we love pass, or live their own separate lives. There's something humongous in that which I can't just comprehend. Surely, that can't be all there is to life? A typical person spends the first quarter of their life in education, then a third of their life asleep, about half of their life working and then the last quarter is spent with their body systems shutting down. What a waste. And then, who really cares about our individual lives? Our memories die as we die, and in a few generations down the line no one will remember our names. 

~~~ Update: this part is more depressing when rereading than when writing, so sorry about that ~~~

Yet we still continue to live, or half-live, bound by the chains of society - we can't even try to enjoy it, because we'll always have bills to pay, rents to fulfil, etc. As we get older, we are constantly surrounded by physical, emotional and mental pains, and really, is that any life at all? What's the point if we can't do whatever the hell we want, be free, and enjoy life's offerings??

"We have created out lives out of materialistic things and ideals that do not exist in the natural world." 

the american dream

To put it simply, what is the American dream?

According to Google, the American dream is "the ideal by which equality of opportunity is available to any American, allowing the highest aspirations and goals to be achieved." This sounds absolutely fantastic, does it not? Well, let's quote our good friend Matt, on why he dislikes the American dream;

"You get a job, you get married, you buy a house, and have your 2.5 children. Society boxes you in and restricts your movements to their expectations. It’s like the matrix. And any deviation is considered abnormal and weird. People may want to travel, tell you they envy what you do, say they wish they could do the same thing. But really, they don’t. They are simply fascinated by a lifestyle so outside the norm. There’s nothing wrong with having a family or owning a house — most of my friends lead happy lives doing so. However, the general attitude in the States is “do it this way if you want to be normal.” And, well, I don’t want to be normal.

I feel like the reason why people tell us we are running away is because they can’t fathom the fact that we broke the mold and are living outside the norm. To want to break all of society’s conventions, there simply must be something wrong with us."

Now, I couldn't possibly be the only person in the entire Universe who believes that really, the American dream sounds like torture. And the worst part? It doesn't just apply to Americans. This backhanded society mindset applies to every single person alive who lives each day on a routine, on a typical 9 - 5 basis, chained to a mundane flattened out life, where our main purpose is to serve the government via work and pay.

I just really don't understand. People want to put this happiness on hold (perhaps forever), just to get money to fuel their lives to fuel more money. It's not even like we own money anymore - the money owns us. Society teaches us to yearn for the American dream, but our lives rely on the materialistic products that this mindset is formed upon.

"You spend all your time making money, so you can spend all your money making time. You work hard to buy a home just to work as hard inside your home. There is no summer vacation from your job – unless you work at a school but then you are back at school."

"Wake up, take a shower, get dressed, go to work, eat lunch, talk about the weather with co-workers, go home, eat dinner, watch TV and/or surf the internet, go to sleep, repeat. No matter how awesome you think your young adult life is now, this is the rut that awaits you."


"Education is to produce uniformity, conformity, and programmability, to provide labor for industrialists (in the form of workers) and labor for the ruling class (in the form of soldiers)." 

Another thing which I really, really dislike, is that the education system is there to produce good workers to rear in more money for the government, and basically teach children from a young age that we should all be slaves to the system. It crushes creativity, it teaches us to strive for the American dream, because this will drastically help the economy, and, also, college will put you in debt for at least 7 years. If education really is about learning life skills and improving our knowledge, then why do we have to pay hundreds or thousands of pounds for it? And why don't we learn useful things like how to pay taxes, or live a sustainable life?? It expects us all to work at the same rate, trying its best to synchronise our abilities.

According to people's experiences with education over at Yahoo;

"Everyone was brainwashed and felt the need to conform, there were no original people or individuals."
"School in general is nothing more than a factory preparing you for the working world, there are no self-persuits in most institutions."
And, "My old school in particular encouraged body image disorders so that people were constantly unhappy with themselves."

the answer
I began writing this post hoping that I would somehow come to an answer that I would be content with. Maybe I need to find God, maybe I need to fall in love, or maybe I just need to eat some really good Thai food. Whichever way, I feel better now that I've ranted to you guys about what keeps me awake at night. Another topic which I was prepared to rant about was the whole 'is there a God?' idea, but decided that as this is a topic that I feel very, very strongly about, I couldn't continue without out severely insulting someone, and although I consider this blog to be a free space to share opinions, I know that this is probably the most controversial topic of all and any potentially negative feedback wouldn't be worth the justifications. I hope that nothing that I talked about in this post offended anyone, and I don't think that it would have, but to quote myself from when I started to write this post (three hours ago), "when you have a rant that feels so raw and unedited, it should be left in. "

So, to summarise;
- I covered a lot of subjects within this post but I think that they're all related one way or another, and so I smushed them altogether in one neat mass.
Don't hate me, all opinions in this post were my own and I honestly tried my best not to offend
- And finally, this post isn't about me throwing conspiracies at my screen. I would never do that. Cough.

Have a good day guys!~~


  1. What a deep post! I've certainly left with a lot to think about ♥
    Amy xx

    Perfect Imperfections

    1. Thank you! And that's just what I was going for c:

  2. Wow, what an insightful post! You make some very interesting points and have worded your opinions ever so nicely (especially about the American dream - "backhand society mindset" - defs reminds me of The Great Gatsby). Sadly, our world is just so materialistic these days, but hey, no need to lose hope, theres always good thai food haha! x

    Shirley | Quartz and Roses

    1. Thanks Shirley! That's so nice for you to say - it was super difficult editing and re-editing the post so that it didn't sound offensive >< Too right about the food!

  3. I like it! You're right about the whole "American Dream" thing. Its sad. I think that as long as you are happy thats all that matters.

    1. You are so right! Happiness nowadays however tends to just roll off an assembly line, if you know what I mean?

  4. Very interesting and deep post, thanks for the inspiring read! <3

    I have a new outfit post on the blog, I would love to know your thoughts:

    * Electric Sunrise - Fashion and Lifestyle Blog *


  5. Very interesting post!
    The education system must change.
    I mean, we are taught to obey and to memorize, not to be good human beings and care about the others.
    They treat us like slaves, like products, like we were disposable.
    And the American Dream strenghthens it.
    I don't want to get married and just live a ordinary life, working for the government.
    They don't care about the people, so what the hell would I care about them (government)?
    There's a Radiohead song that I love, it's called No Surprises and it always makes me think about "this life".
    "You look so tired and unhappy
    Bring down the government
    They don't, they don't speak for us
    I'll take a quiet life
    A handshake of carbon monoxide"
    Besos :):)


    1. Iza, I appreciate your comment so much. You have completely understood the message that I was trying to convey, what you say is worded so awesomely perfect! Totally agree. ^^

  6. You have some interesting points in this post, Amy, only thing, I wanted to say, is that having a job, owning a house, is definitely happiness. Unfortunately, not every country gives people (especially, immigrants) this kind of opportunity, even after hard work. I agree , in 21st century, the life has become very materialistic, but it's not only in USA, but in every capitalistic country. The same thing about 9-to-5 jobs, in every capitalistic country, people with regular jobs, have the same routine like the Americans have.
    I'm from a European country, living in USA last 5 years and I can say, I've never felt so free in my entire life, like here, in USA. To me, The best thing about American society is that, nobody judges you for your look, for your lifestyle, for your habits. As long as people work for their success they will get it (sure, success is very subjective thing, though). So, I felt like, your view of American dream was exaggerated.

    1. Nina, I completely understand what you are saying. A message that I tried to convey in this post is that happiness means something different to everyone - I know people who are content with their average 9 - 5 day, and that's good for them. I'm basing this from a European perspective, but I know what you mean about success being subjective. It's nice to hear others opinions too, so thank you for that insight c:

  7. I think everyone goes theough that, "What is the meaning of life" but I say find God. But it is all up to you. :)

    1. Maybe you're right Hilda, thank you for your insight C:

  8. At some point in your life you stop to think about some things, and you are busy with life. But you never stop thinking, and you never loose your ability to see things. I'm sure you are great person! Best wishes
    XL-ka plus size fashion

  9. People do that a lot? Don't they? Just read the last line and be done with it. Annoys the hell outta me.
    I do believe everyone has a specific role to play. We're learning from our surroundings every second. Also, never much though about heaven and ghost and reincarnation like that but yea you make some valid point....it does suck

    1. I KNOW RIGHT! Exactly, I think that's quite a nice thought. Thank you ^^

  10. I think we're all here to learn how to make ourselves better. We experience different situations to teach us lessons and help shape us into more experienced individuals.

    1. That's a really nice thought, thanks for your input C:

  11. Hmm. This is a really deep, interesting post you've written here. There are some things I agree with you about, such as lessons, and the American Dream (sort of), but there is also plenty I wish I could debate with you about, such as the afterlife, and the meaning of life.
    Gahh, I wish these topics weren't so complicated and controversial, otherwise I would definitely be the first one sharing my thoughts to the world as well. I just don't think I could do it without forcing my opinions across, so I really respect that you're able to write this without doing that too much :)
    Thanks for being vulnerable enough to share this!
    - July, http://julyaemmance.blogspot.com/

    1. Thank you July! And I had to keep checking over what I was writing to make sure that I didn't come across as insulting in any way ><

  12. Wow, this is a very heavy, but also very honest post. First, I am really glad you posted this. I think about this kind of stuff a LOT, and I feel like no one else does. So now I feel a little less odd ;)

    I desperately WANT there to be some kind of heaven (though perhaps not as we picture it, because you're right, the monotony sounds horrible!) because it literally causes me panic to think we just cease to exist. How? What about all my thoughts, all the love I have for people? It doesn't seem right that it all just vanishes.

    Like you, I ponder the "what is the point?" all the time. I hate the "working to live" thing. My husband works 12 hour days, I stay at home with our two kids all day by myself, and we do not even have enough money to pay the TON of bills we are left with. Just to survive, with a (very modest) roof over our heads. And that education? He has a master's degree. I have a bachelor's degree, and between us, we can't make enough money to live. This is not what I wanted from my life. I feel like your brother probably felt, the one who talked himself OUT of his dreams.

    I did that my whole life. I am doing it this very minute, just thinking about trying to make a change. I want to feel consuming love, and passion for doing something, and just... I don't know, I want to LIVE. Not just the mundane nonsense, but actually feeling alive.

    I don't want to be "normal" either. I don't know what the purpose is at all, or if there is one. And now, I am craving Thai food ;) Thank you so, so much for sharing this!

    1. Ahaha, I feel less odd too ^^ AND EXACTLY, you completely get it! But twelve hour days? Jeez that's heavy, sorry about that.
      Really? you both have degrees? That honestly sucks, I read something the other day about someone with a PHD who couldn't even get a low pay job, which is pretty crap. I hope to avoid that.
      I totally understand what you're saying, but dude, stop thinking about making a change, take the leap! But then I suppose that it's easier said than done ><
      No problem c;

  13. Well, this is a tought-inspiring post. Life teaches you a lot of things. One of the best lessons I've learnt is that you must love yourself and don't care much about the opinion of the others, mainly because those people probably are being malicious, like your brother's teacher.

    Jasmine xx

    1. Thank you Jasmine, exactly what I was aiming for. But awh dude, that's so much easier said than done! I'd love to go all Kat Stratford- esque on people and completely blank out what other people think about me so I can just live for myself, but oh would that be difficult.

  14. I get what you mean about the afterlife, but IDK . . . I kind of like all those options. Heaven, for obvious reasons and I can't imagine you'd ever get bored. More like it's this higher plane and the whole point is there is no boredom because you're not really 'conscious' as we know now. It's a different sort of consciousness and we don't exist in the same way. That's how I've always seen it anyway.

    I also like the idea of reincarnation, because I think it's kind of nice to think that nothing ever ends and there's a cycle to life. Like, we're all connected and one way or another we live on.

    And ghosts . . . well, I'd obviously just like to spy on people ;)

    1. Hm, I know what you mean. But then the idea of my consciousness changing to something where I don't get emotions like boredom kind of scares me a tad! And reincarnation is a lovely thought, but to lose my memories and feelings and stuff would suck ><

  15. Ahh, I drive myself nuts thinking about stuff like this. Reincarnation might as well be dying with nothing afterwards if you can't remember anything from your previous life. The thought of not existing anymore really scares me. I just can't comprehend not being. I also have similar troubles when I think about the universe, what came before it, what's outside it, is there an outside - it terrifies me!

    Corinne x

    1. Exactly, Corinne! You totally caught the drift of the horrors of this post c;

  16. Well, first of all, I take my hat off to you for sharing your thoughts/views on your blog, as many of the topics you've covered tend not to be shared by others for open discussion haha. I think our opinions will inevitably alter depending on our mood - however as a general rule, I believe that although everyone (myself included) can be distracted by tick-boxes and achievements along the way, the ultimate goal is to remain true to yourself and show kindness to everyone. A 'lightbulb' moment for me a while ago was realising that ultimately, nothing but kindness matters - and that was surprisingly liberating. Also personally, seeing as you mentioned the topic, I believe in a heaven. If I opened my mind to there being no heaven, then it would be difficult to understand why there is 'right' and 'wrong' in the world.. and once you've abolished those two rulings, you're on a slippery slope..

    Anyway, this was an incredibly interesting post to read through and very thought-provoking! My advice would be not to think too deeply into the general meaning of life, it can open a lot of doors that you may find difficult closing (and yes, I realise that sounds like the opening line of a film hahah).

    Hope you're well and having a good week so far! :)

    Gabrielle | A Glass Of Ice 


    1. Thank you dude. And naturally, I knew that this post would be somewhat biased due to the fact that it is based on my opinion alone.
      The idea that nothing that kindness matters is an excellent thought and one that I think people should believe in, even a tiny bit, anyway, but still I can't help but hope for *more* than that.
      Yes, you're right about the 'right' and 'wrong' bit, but I think that people should still differentiate between good and bad regardless of religion, you know?
      Good tip, thank you C:

  17. great post

  18. Great post, sure I'm following your blog <3

  19. This was very very insightful, pure philosophy. I'll tell you what I think. I think that who/what we come across in life is part of a higher design, but then it's up to us to choose and there's no way of stopping us if we really want to achieve something/our dream. I don't want to think about afterlife in detail, but thinking that my mum is up there somewhere makes me feel safer. Great post dear, truly.
    Coco et La vie en rose - Valeria Arizzi

    1. Thank you Coco, and that's just what I was hoping for. The idea of a higher power is reassuring, and what you say is pretty inspiring aha. And yes, that's always a good way of thinking c:

  20. Wow this is too deep... Life sometimes can be difficult.. thanks for sharing your thoughts!! xx

  21. I believe that things always happen for a reason, and I agree with you that there's a meaning to everything that has happened to us - people or events. Love the quote about seeing the signs. If we have faith, things will fall into place regardless if it's the way we expected it to be.

    I also thought that the topic you discussed on the afterlife is very honest and reflective. That section is not worth to skip because it gives insights of another's beliefs and when that comes out as a frank opinion like that, it shows genuineness. :) Given that people have different personalities and attitudes, we clearly have different views on the meaning of life as well. Some see it as a search for faith, others find purpose in the world by doing what they love, savouring precious moments with loved ones in this temporary realm.

    Saying that life has no meaning, however, is an unfulfilling understatement, and I'd like to believe that with the likable, feisty personality you have, you still have a sense that life is more than just the materialistic world. People don't just consume and survive on goods and cash - they survive with happiness, as well as the beauty of having their loved ones around them. They survive with faith and individual beliefs that helps them cope with adversities. They survive with the knowledge that should they only look at their material wealth and mere tangible items, they will not be content with what they have no matter how much they possess. The meaning of life is sacred, not just because its period is temporary. It's best we use this time to keep our faith and enjoy the little things, otherwise it's the troubles, conflicts, pain that are left in our eyes.

    I've also heard of the American Dream, but never really thought about it seriously because it didn't concern me that much as Americans. However it does seem that the dream relies heavily on achievements through material wealth, and that may not be the only factor to live a genuinely happy life. You're right to be annoyed by it. Happiness comes with contentment of the things around us, not tangible achievements. :)

    I do agree to some extent about the education system being a poor method of sharing knowledge. Creativity can be affected, yet at the same time it's always important to learn to crawl before we walk and run, so a structured system where we learn the basics whether we enjoy it or not, is perhaps required too. It's also a way of self-discovery, we get to define ourselves and explore our interests. :)

    Hope you'll eventually find the answer you're looking for. I have no expertise and I'd like to think that I'm in no position to proselytise or give my opinion on what you can do, but I wish you the best in your journey to self-discovery and personal development. Have a lovely week ahead. :)

    1. Firstly Dian, you have written the longest comment on a post written by me that this blog has ever seen, so thank you so much for that! I also like to believe that things that certain things happen for a reason, but then I'm not sure if I want to believe that everything we do was already decided, if you know what I mean?
      Thank you, I did try c; What you say is so interesting, it's nice to hear (read?) your opinion.
      I want to believe what you say about people surviving on happiness and love and faith, but I just can't help but think of all the people who haven't managed to fulfil their dreams and wishes and feel disappointed and down because maybe they were denied the choice to be what they wanted to be or whatnot.. However, I completely understand what you say about people wanting more of materialistic things and never feeling content with what they have.
      I love what you said about "The meaning of life is sacred, not just because its period is temporary." - I feel like it should be a quote or something aha.
      I suppose that the American Dream doesn't affect me that much either because I'm European, but I suppose that the ideas still relevant in England. Thanks dude c;
      Exactly! A structured system can be relevant as the building blocks of developing young people, but I also think that once basics are covered we should really just stick to things we enjoy learning about and will be necessary to our future selves. "Self discovery" is too right!
      Finally, thank you dude! Both for your thoughts, the super long and awesome comment and the praise, aha c;

  22. You might be my soul sis when it comes to train of thoughts late at night! Props to you for sharing this, it was very interesting reading it. I mostly want to comment on "lessons" because I do believe everyone you meet, have in your life, or simply cross paths with - it's all for a reason. Same with all the highs and lows we experience, it inevitably teaches us something, a life lesson :)

    1. Ahaha ^^ And thank you Kie, it's great to know that I share similar opinions to my blog readers c; Totally understand!

  23. I've just found your blog and I think it's really inspiring, it will be an honor for me if you can visit mine too, and if you want to follow, it will be a pleasure to follow you back! :) <3

    By the way I am having a cute giveaway on my blog, you can win a lollipop necklace, I hope you join and If you do, good luck, I hope you win! <3

    Fashion gets Fierce.
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  24. Such an interesting post! So inspiring! Thanks for sharing!

  25. Great post. In my opinion school is a piece of crap, because teachers aren't honest and they shouldn't say that you won't achieve anything.

    1. Thank you, and aha I appreciate your opinion ^^

  26. Very interesting post!

  27. I think about it once in a while. The purpose of life for me is to just live and have fun, the way I can... I think, I'm trying my best but who knows. Our society has split up so much already into those who don't work and those who work for those who don't, it's never going to change I believe. Education is one good piece of propaganda, and, frankly, a huge waste of money for the majority. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
    Lera's Affordable Fashion Blog

    1. That's a very positive way of looking at things, and I completely understand what you mean c: But although what you say about "those who don't work and those who work for those who don't" and you don't believe it will change is pretty depressing, I actually agree. Propaganda is the exact word that I would use to describe the education system!

  28. OMG YES! High five sista, I get these EXACT kind of thoughts at 2am >_<.


  29. Beautiful post

    Love Vikee

  30. This is such an amazing thought-provoking post. I didn't really have an opinion on the american dream before reading this so now I do.
    Great blog, I can not believe I have only just found it. I love your blog design. That is so cool that you own a Grease vinyl soundtrack I am a little bit jealous.

    I am also a huge fan of Tom Odell.

    Amazing blog, new follower on bloglovin.

    If you have a spare moment please checkout my blog,

    I would love any advice you may have and maybe even a follow back xx

    Another Teen On The Web

  31. Amy IGNORE that last comment I was trying to copy my URL and ended up posting my comment on another blog instead of the bit I just wanted I am sorry.
    What I was trying to say is amazing post I loved it, I certainly now have an opinion on the American Dream something I didn't before.
    Another amazing post

    Another Teen On The Web

    1. Ohmygosh ahahaha, I was so confused >< But that's totally cool, thank you c;

  32. Hi Amy, this is a really deep, interesting post--definitely a nice read!
    I would really want to give my full opinion, but I don't want to offend or force my beliefs on anyone, you know? But honestly, I think it's really admirable how you were able to word this post in such a respectful way! Kudos to you! xx

    For the wondering about heaven part, I believe that there is. I don't think that you could ever be "bored" of heaven---”bored” is a word on Earth. I once read somewhere on a forum that “Boredom while technically not a sin is a result of the cursed world we live in. We become bored with life, we desire more to do, something entertaining or something new. This will not be a problem in heaven, we will constantly be overflowing with joy and happiness, and with an infinite amount of things to do I don't think any of us will ever get bored.”
    However, for you wondering about the "Is there a God?" thing and the meaning of life, I'll leave you with this: If there was no Creator, then there would be no meaning of life, would it? If we simply just evolved by this coincidental collision of two things and we're just here and we grow and then we die, then where's the meaning?
    I don't want to sound like I'm forcing something onto you, so I'll stop now, ha ha. If you ever want to have a single conversation or something more on this topic, you can always email me :)
    Thank you for such an interesting post and for being so open-minded! xx
    Have a lovely day!

    1. Thank you so much MJ! I had to keep writing and re-writing this post to make sure that it couldn't be taken in the wrong way, and I'm glad you think that it sounded respectful.
      That is a good explanation, thank you. I understand what you're saying, and so that's quite a positive thing to believe in.
      AND I KNOW RIGHT, I'm not what people would call "religious", and so the idea of the lack of meaning is very daunting, but I don't want to commit to a religion either so I'm kind of stuck rent I aha?

  33. Amy, thank you for being so open with your thoughts and questions. It's not easy to share something so personal. A lot of the time I just need to let my thoughts out and that's why I write on my blog and in my journal.

    I'm a Christian, so you probably already know what kind of answers I have to these questions...you've probably heard it all before. I guess I would try to encourage you to keep looking for the answers to these questions. They're questions we have to face every day of our lives. As a Christian, I still wrestle with these questions on a regular basis. It's not like religion gives you an automatic fix for these kinds of problems.

    I would encourage you to go read the book of Ecclesiastes. It's a book about a man who's struggling to find any purpose in life. He explores every joy and good thing in this world and his conclusion is always the same, "Everything is vanity." Everything is fleeting and meaningless. Ultimately death robs us of everything we might accomplish or cherish in this life. So what's the point? The answer isn't as easy as you might think. It's also not as simple as a lot of Christians want to make it.

    A little over a year ago, my seventeen-year-old brother (he'd be eighteen years old now) died in an accident. It was so unexpected and shocking to my whole family. Since then, my faith's kind of been put on the chopping block more than once. Believing that God is sovereign and in control isn't always easy. I've had to come to the conclusion that life isn't about happiness or trying to make myself feel good. It's about hope. It's about finding a hope that surpasses death and surpasses the pointlessness of this life.

    Thank you for being so open and honest about your feelings and thoughts. Don't stop asking the questions and don't stop looking for the answers.

    a vapor in the wind

    1. Thank you Danielle, your comment and opinions mean a lot.
      I actually spoke to a Christian preacher yesterday, and he actually mentioned some of these things, but I'm still buddhist/ atheist.
      Ohmygoodness dude, that is so awful, I'm so sorry for your loss.
      I like to believe that something happens when we die, because the possibility of nothingness terrifies me. Hope is good.
      Thank you so much Danielle.

  34. I love reading posts like this. Something that makes you really think about life. As usual, this is truly a great post Amy!

    Xoxo. Alexis
    Lexi Swoons

    1. Thank you Lexi! I just really felt like I needed to let my rant out aha.