If you ignore the fact that I hadn't dusted before taking these photos (oops), you will realise that it is the most gorgeous thing EVER. It's purple, and when I took it to Tenerife it glittered in the sun and looked pretty awesome.
I'm naming it Jayze. (pronounced jay-zzz)
Technical stuff - http://www.currys.co.uk/gbuk/cameras/digital-cameras/bridge-cameras/nikon-coolpix-p520-bridge-camera-21328874-pdt.html