Well well well, guess what I found. A Draft in the Archive that I never actually posted...
I am going to attempt task one and two of my mission to cure my arachnophobia, just for the fun of it (and I have a lot of time on my hands..(: )
1. Q; What do I hate about spiders?
1. A; If I'm completely honest, I'm just REALLY freaked out that I'm going to hurt one. I hate it when people just kick them into the floor and kill one, because honestly, what more right to we have to live than them? HMMMM??? Also, it doesn't help that they have eight very long, very hairy legs, eight very wide, very scary eyes, teeth sharp enough to chew through brick, and very quick, sharp senses that let it know if you're scared, so they can jump up on you and bite you to death. FACT- THIS HAS HAPPENED MANY, MANY TIMES BEFORE IN COUNTRIES AS 'SAFE' AS ENGLAND AND WALES, SO THERE.
2. Q; When did I start fearing spiders?
2. A; It was probably when I was back in Infant school, and me and my best friend had become very close friends with a slug (same family as spiders, sort of). But then, she went to the toilet and I stayed with... lets call him Sluggy. Anyway, then a boy in my year came up to me and Sluggy, lifted his big fat foot boot and... well, I closed my eyes. But the last thing I saw was Sluggy's eyes open wide in horror before he was... squished. Then, a few weeks back, there was a BAKED SPIDER IN WITH MY MASHED POTATO at Dinner. It was THE SHELL LEFT OF A DEAD MONEY SPIDER'S SOUL. (I think this all sounds very deep..) Just the fact that there was a lifeless shell in my dinner was sure to plant a fear of spiders deep inside me.
Okay, so if I've scared you with any of my facts or past experiences, please call the Helpline at 0800-Something. Hope I helped.
Weird, huh? I think my writing style has changed A LOT since then.
But other than that...
SUGAR, SPICE AND CANDYFLOSS*,
*My new tagline has been decided! Comments PLEASEEEEE